Who’s In Your 5?
Brothers, can you name your top 5 friends? No family members, just friends.
Why five? A common theory is that we are the average of the five people we spend the most time with. If I were a betting man, I’d guess like me, you couldn’t do it unless you’re still in your 20’s.
In our early years we are known by the number of our friends. But, as we mature, we ground our identity in titles, degrees, promotions or being parents. Yep, to no surprise, we become known by our accomplishments and kids.
A study showed that the number of close friends in 1985 was 3, while by 2004 it was zero. The number of people without any close friends in 1985 was 36%, and in 2004 it was 53.4%
A 2017 study showed most men had 1 close friend. Of course, jobs and families play a role, but we, men still see ourselves as singular in nature and without a need for close bonds or the intimacy of friendship.
This isn’t the biblical standard for men. God created us for relationship. With Him and with each other. Good friends challenge us and call us on the junk in our lives. They care less about our salary and more about our souls.
“Faithful are the wounds of a friend; profuse are the kisses of an enemy.” ~ Proverbs 27:6
I know it’s tough to reach out to make friends as we get set into our adult lives, but you’re not alone. Even the churches are filled with friendless men just hoping to make a connection that’ll breathe life back into them.
Be a man, and start building your brotherhood. The next time you or someone offers to grab lunch or a coffee, take them up on it. Add to your 5 and add to the quality of your life.
As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another. ~ Proverbs 27:17